Things that just occurred to me, in no particular order

Posts tagged ‘Speculation’

Beyond tomorrow

A few days ago, I muttered the following nonsensical statement in plain view of other people, with my bare face hanging out and everything:

“Well, you know, I never follow anyone on Twitter until I run them through FollowCost. You never know when someone you follow might end going nuclear, you know, and who needs that?”

The person that sits across from me, the sage Lindsay Tice (@ltice to Twitter folk) looked at me and said “That’s a sentence that wouldn’t have made a damn bit of sense two years ago.”

Then she added: “I wonder what we’ll be saying in two years that make no sense today.”

Really good point, especially considering politics. If you would have told me, just three months ago, that conservatives would have been walking around talking about “Teabagging this” and “Teabagging that” in complete seriousness I just would not have bought it. (Sometimes I think reality is written by an author with a profoundly twisted sense of humor, and he probably blogs for Daily Kos in his spare time.)

The best I could come up with at the time was  “Soylent green gives me gas, and these damn VR goggles give me a headache.”

But, hey, anyone can do better than that. So I  opened it up on Twitter. Here are some of the responses I got. Feel free to come up with your own:

  • “Did they let Rush and Cheney out of Guantanamo yet?”
  • “My plasma car loses power at 15,000 feet.”
  • “You know, I liked my iPhone better before they made thumbs obsolete.”
  • “It’s really cold here on Mars.”
  • “I like the new GPS implants, but man, they itch.”
  • “Hey, man, know where I can score a latte?”
  • “I’m glad the economy turned around, but the follicle tax is a little much.”


Ernst Schrodinger was a physicist, a perplexing and confusing theoreticist who only wanted to prove how pointless and ridiculous the current state of theoretical physics was.

Schrodinger wanted to disprove quantum physics by way of an elaborate thought experriment: an average, every day cat is placed in a box with some sort of suicide contraption that refers to a bit of nuclear material. If an electron in that material decays, the cat dies. If it does not, the cat lives.
Math based on quantum mechanics comes to an annoying conclusion: the cat is both alive and dead right up until the moment the box is opened.

Schrodinger wanted to demonstrate the pointlessness of math that gave two answers. He wound up creating a symbol of modern life.

Life is all about the waiting. It’s all in the details between one decision in the next. Decisions, like opening the box, are short-lived things. They come and go quickly. But what matters is what happens in the mean time, while the decision to open the box is still pending.

Nobody ever thinks about the cat, sitting there in the box. Does it do anything while it’s waiting? Can it control it’s fate and avoid death? Sure it can. That’s the nature of being alive, of being the quantum state personified.

Some times, you feel just like that cat, waiting for someone to open the stupid box and figure out if you’re dead or not. The question is, what do you do while you’re in the box?

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